Episode Two - Script

Here is the script that James wrote for our second episode.


"starts off with everyone sitting down at their desks, sonny starts talking to keith

sonny: keith. we’ve been sitting here for 15 minutes now. why haven’t you annoyed me yet?

keith: (looks frustrated with sonny) I'm pacing myself

sonny: so, you’re going to annoy me in a little while instead

keith: no. you ignoranus

sonny: (laughs)

vince and valerie start talking over sonny laughing

vince: what did you call him?

valerie: ignoranus, what the hell have you been smoking in your crack pipe.

sonny: crack (continues laughing)

pier: guys, i’ve nailed it. i have nailed it (bangs book on desk)

keith: sorry, but am i going completely mad? (raises voice)

valerie: going?

sonny: you’ve been a patient at the fucking luni-bin for a while mate

keith: can i just explain how im pacing my. fucking self

sonny: well, it happens

pier: what

sonny: he’s annoying me again

keith: fuck you guys

pause for a while

vince: enlighten me keith

keith: i’ve left my redbull outside the door. so i’m only allowed some every 30 minutes. it should help me sleep. hence, why i’m pacing myself.

everyone stares at him

vince: you didn’t enlighten me

chris: really. (everyone stares) how’s it working out for you. that’s a good idea. good little system. pacing yourself. i do the same for when i play guitar. i don’t want to overwork myself, you know.

everyone continues staring, silence

sonny: who. the. fuck. are you? (shocked face)

chris: i’m chris, pleased to meet you

valerie: why are you in detention then, did you kiss the teachers arse too much

pier: you do seem the type that would stay out, if i’m honest

chris: i chewed gum in class.

vince: i’ve seen things you wouldn’t believe

pause

sonny: wrong moment vince

vince: sorry

pier: (speaking to chris) is that all

chris: yeh, nothing really bad. why you in detention then?

pier: if i told you, i’d have to kill you

fade out

keith and chris are sitting together

keith: thanks for thinking my idea was good by the way. these guys don’t appreciate me.

chris: that’s alright. actually. it’s half past now. you want me to go get your red bull from outside?

keith: (excited voice, slightly nagging) oh yes please. that’d be great. (laughs) if i didn’t have that. i’d probably los the plot. have an axiety attack or something.

chris: that’s okay, i’ll go get it

chris goes to open door, but it doesn’t open

chris: uh, guys. the door isn’t opening

keith: what! (loud, going out of control)

keith starts having an axiety attack, shaking his shoulders. sonny walks up to him and punches him in the face. he falls onto his chair.

sonny: i am not going through that shit again

valerie: the less of that the better

sonny: don’t talk to me

valerie: screw you sonny

chris: what the hell is wrong with you?

sonny: trust me, you’ll thank me later

vince: he is a crazy, moonstruck hound junkie. he needs to be controlled

pier: (talks to chris) did you say the doors locked?

chris: why else would hound junkie have gone fucking mental

sonny: you’re learning

pier: so, i’m trapped here? (looks worried)

chris: yes. we all are

sonny: that’s alright, pier will think of a plan

pier: (awkward laugh) yeh. sure. i’ll think of something

valerie: what. is your mind blank?

vince: what about your amazing idea earlier

pier: i’ll think of another one. that plan isn’t well suited for this type of escape

sonny: type of escape...(interrupts)

pier: stay the fuck out of this sonny. i’ll think of a plan. just give me a minute to gather my thoughts.

fade out.

fades in - 20 minutes later

chris: it’s been ages. a teacher hasn’t even come and checked up on us.

sonny: they don’t. teachers. they’re quite happy to just leave us here to rot. we’re trash to them. we’re the ones who fuck the system. and when your in here, your trash too.

chris: i’m not trash, i’m a good student.

valerie: no your not. you’re a fucking criminal.

vince: i don’t see what’s so special about rugby balls anyway. wilson this and wilson that. basket balls are better. i could have a good conversation with a basket ball

everyone looks over at vince

chris: what are you talking about?

vince: when we’ve been driven to madness. i wanna know who my best friend will be

chris: and you chose a basket ball?

vince: yeh

sonny: suppose they got a nice tan. just don’t impregnate it, might have loadsa golf balls rolling about.

vince: you don’t understand. you’re not ready for the truth

chris: i need to get out of here, any plan yet?

pier: i can’t think. i’m lost. i’m lost.( hangs his head in shame, crying)

sonny: every single fucking day, you think of a plan to escape. every. single, fucking day. are you telling me that the one day we need to a plan, you can’t think of one?

pier: i’m sorry (wails) i’m lost

sonny: you can do it, think

pier: i can’t

sonny: yes you can. ( stands up and grabs piers head) use your head!

rams piers head into the door

valerie: great. now what?

chris: we’re trapped

sonny: fuck sake, stand back, i’ll get the door open

sonny kicks the door really hard, nothing happens

chris: we’re screwed.

pier: (wakes back up) uh, what happened

sonny: call a doctor

pier: sonny, i’m fine, just got a fucking bad headache.

chris: not surprised ( murmurs)

sonny: not for you dipshit

valerie/chris: who

sonny: for me. i think i’ve just broken my leg

end credits"